Trigger warning: Mentions of child abuse, sexual abuse, exploitation, grooming, and pedophilia. Reader's discretion is advised.
Age doesn’t matter.
Now that I have your attention, did you know that the age of sexual consent in the Philippines prior to the 7th of March 2022 was 12 years old? I want you to look back as hard as you can to when you were 12 and think about what you looked like, your hobbies, what you enjoyed, and most importantly, the decisions you made.
Do you think at that age, you were truly capable of understanding the very concept of sex, its consequences, and necessary precautions? Would you have fully grasped the criminality of an adult or someone older than you engaging in sexual relations with someone who was just 12 years old? 13? 14?
Unfortunately, the common answer by some would be that the child consented to it, therefore it is legal in the eyes of the law. By that logic, it’s fine if say, a 16-year-old were to have sex with a younger person, or even worse, let’s say a 20-year-old and 14-year-old also did the same.
It’s time to call it what it is: Grooming. Pedophilia. Manipulation. Exploitation. Abuse.
No adult should ever dare to think it’s fine—in any way, shape, or form—to look at children in a sexual manner. An older person is not in love with a child, regardless of what they claim. The only reason they would be in a relationship with a child is because of sexual gain.
Grooming and pedophilia have become so prevalent in the Philippines. The fact that people are desensitized to the idea of an older person taking advantage of a child's naivete stems from not only our low age of consent but also because of our sexualization of children from as early as their infancy.
Minors even back then and most especially now are prone to sexualizing themselves under the misguided idea of finding liberation and self-confidence. What minors ultimately fail to see is that they can be confident with themselves without having to seek sexual validation and that they can find liberation in just letting themselves be young and explore their personalities through different hobbies and skills.
Children who willingly put themselves under these circumstances are likely caused by the media's exposure of children to easily accessible pornographic material and people on the internet enabling them to dress in skimpy clothes, regardless of their intentions being good or not. This is not to say that the children are to blame for their own sexual exploitation, but rather an example of how easily a minor’s mind is influenced by external factors that subconsciously lead them to dark and dangerous paths.
One of the major issues with the sexualization of minors is how easily predators have access to communication with young children. Whether it’s catfishing or outright manipulation, the desires of minors for liberation are taken advantage of with phrases like you’re so mature for your age; you’re not like the other kids your age; you look older than [minor age]; you can trust me because no one understands you the way I do; have you ever masturbated? I can show you how, it feels really good. The reason why this works most of the time is that victims of these predatory tactics are children who are at the age where they are finding themselves and wanting to prove that they aren’t little kids anymore. Thus, they are easily tricked by the attention and false validation fed to them by their abuser.
In the Philippines, with platforms like TikTok, Omegle or OmeTV, ChatRoulette, and even Discord becoming prevalent and accessible to minors, it is easier for predators to engage with their next victims. Due to the lack of thorough age-restriction protocols in these sites, the fact that grown people are able to chat with underaged children contributes to the normalization of child grooming and pedophilia.
People not directly involved in these situations aren’t off the hook when it comes to contributing to the heavy normalization of child sexualization. Our responses to finding out about a relationship between a minor and their groomer say a lot about what we choose to enable and don’t.
Telling people who call out abusers to move on because it has happened a long time ago isn’t exactly the best take as you’re basically downplaying the seriousness of child exploitation. Survivors of abuse and the people who rightfully call out child predators should never be told by anyone to just come to terms and forget their experiences with exploitation.
Passivity and indifference towards child groomers are most prevalent when the predators in question are significant figures because people treat talent and influence as a free pass for heinous and deplorable behavior, even if they leave negative effects on someone's life. Just because someone is a terrific film director, a well-regarded singer, or a popular volleyball player does not mean they should be excused for taking advantage of children.
Children are not supposed to have to worry about how “hot and sexy” they are. Instead, it is us that should be worried about the people who instill in them those insecurities. We shouldn’t stand idly and not make a big deal out of children being taken advantage of by predators. Our response to child exploitation should always be outrage and disgust, never indifference.
